Save the girl child! Women empowerment! Female infanticide! Rape (though mentioned only in context of women)!
These are real issues that plague our society today - real, important issues. We, the people, plead for 'someone' to take action against these issues. The government is not acting, we say. I am, in no way, undermining the cry against inaction. It is very important to raise our voices against such atrocities, and it is commendable that we have begun to empathize with victims of inhumanity, without any cultural, racial or social bias (or so I hope!)
My concern is - what are we doing besides whining? Is there any bit of house cleaning being done? Are we internalizing the change we aspire to see around us? Are we not marginalizing one section and thereby creating more imbalance in the society? We say we are feminists - do we even make an attempt to understand the term? Unfortunately we mix up the term equality with individuality. Do we understand the difference between the two? Is everyone really EQUAL? Are we striving to be equal? Can we become equal?
My answer is - NO.
We are - each one of us - born different, and must be treated as such. In this scuffle of slogans, the only usage of the term that I agree to, is the Right to 'Equal' Opportunities. Beyond that, stop this guff about equality, as it only leads to further confusion.
To drive the point home, let us start from the beginning. How are we grooming our children? Are we teaching the kids to understand, appreciate and respect the other gender, in a holistic way? What kind of toys and games are we buying for them - while we may buy the daughter a toy car, do we buy the son a kitchen set? While we teach the son to cook, are we teaching the daughter to fix that puncture? Are we providing EQUAL opportunities in our own houses? Are we setting the right example for our kids by sharing the household responsibilities, by treating each other respectfully and humanely (the women be soft-spoken, dependent care-takers, and the men be aggressive, cash-earning providers)? Are we ready to break the stereotypes and more importantly are we ready to accept the stereotypes to be broken by others?
Let us go on to the professional world. How do we treat the 'other' section at work? How many men are comfortable working under women bosses? Do we (be it a man or woman) perceive a woman's climb up the ladder, judgmentally - assuming she would be promiscuous enough to get that promotion? What do we think about men whose wives have more successful careers than them, or about the house-husbands? Does anyone talk about fathers getting their children to work, or Work-life balance for men/fathers? What about people who are not in a wed-lock or who do not have children? What about people of other sexual orientations?
These questions are merely tip of the iceberg.
Here's a thought - while we might claim to nod in affirmation to a majority of questions raised above, lets take a step back and reflect: do we REALLY practice what we preach? Lets us all begin by treating others the way we want to be treated ourselves, and let's get a perspective by stepping into the other person's shoes, and then if we fail to see their point of view, let us leave it at that - let us not force our believes on them.
As I had once read somewhere - there is no definitive right or wrong, there is only MY right and MY wrong.
Signing off...
These are real issues that plague our society today - real, important issues. We, the people, plead for 'someone' to take action against these issues. The government is not acting, we say. I am, in no way, undermining the cry against inaction. It is very important to raise our voices against such atrocities, and it is commendable that we have begun to empathize with victims of inhumanity, without any cultural, racial or social bias (or so I hope!)
My concern is - what are we doing besides whining? Is there any bit of house cleaning being done? Are we internalizing the change we aspire to see around us? Are we not marginalizing one section and thereby creating more imbalance in the society? We say we are feminists - do we even make an attempt to understand the term? Unfortunately we mix up the term equality with individuality. Do we understand the difference between the two? Is everyone really EQUAL? Are we striving to be equal? Can we become equal?
My answer is - NO.
We are - each one of us - born different, and must be treated as such. In this scuffle of slogans, the only usage of the term that I agree to, is the Right to 'Equal' Opportunities. Beyond that, stop this guff about equality, as it only leads to further confusion.
To drive the point home, let us start from the beginning. How are we grooming our children? Are we teaching the kids to understand, appreciate and respect the other gender, in a holistic way? What kind of toys and games are we buying for them - while we may buy the daughter a toy car, do we buy the son a kitchen set? While we teach the son to cook, are we teaching the daughter to fix that puncture? Are we providing EQUAL opportunities in our own houses? Are we setting the right example for our kids by sharing the household responsibilities, by treating each other respectfully and humanely (the women be soft-spoken, dependent care-takers, and the men be aggressive, cash-earning providers)? Are we ready to break the stereotypes and more importantly are we ready to accept the stereotypes to be broken by others?
Let us go on to the professional world. How do we treat the 'other' section at work? How many men are comfortable working under women bosses? Do we (be it a man or woman) perceive a woman's climb up the ladder, judgmentally - assuming she would be promiscuous enough to get that promotion? What do we think about men whose wives have more successful careers than them, or about the house-husbands? Does anyone talk about fathers getting their children to work, or Work-life balance for men/fathers? What about people who are not in a wed-lock or who do not have children? What about people of other sexual orientations?
These questions are merely tip of the iceberg.
Here's a thought - while we might claim to nod in affirmation to a majority of questions raised above, lets take a step back and reflect: do we REALLY practice what we preach? Lets us all begin by treating others the way we want to be treated ourselves, and let's get a perspective by stepping into the other person's shoes, and then if we fail to see their point of view, let us leave it at that - let us not force our believes on them.
As I had once read somewhere - there is no definitive right or wrong, there is only MY right and MY wrong.
Signing off...
Insightful, and you have impressively closed the article without forcing an opinion. Makes one think!
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